Housekeeping Notes

Thursday/Friday

Shower, no towel

When will I get a new towel? I started this train journey on May 16th with four towels--two hand-size and two bath-size....if you are a size two...which I am. During the past week, towels have fallen by the wayside, variously being used to clean me, to mop up the floor after a shower (the bathroom does not have a separate shower area), etc. I am now down to one towel (plus the one I "borrowed" from the Beijing Kempinski in anticipation of a towel shortage on the train). Because I packed a silk robe bought in China years ago (and rarely worn), I am now contemplating using the terry-cloth robe supplied by the train company as a fifth towel.

A priceless bottle of voda

Water is another thing. Included in the $10,000-plus price tag is one bottle of water a day. That's right, one bottle. Mind you, the train's water is not potable, so one has to brush one's teeth with bottled water (and a toothbrush, of course), as well as using the liquid for hydration. If you want more water, you can buy it on the train or stock up during stops. Okay, fine. Except that the first three days of the train ride, our first-class cabin wasn't even getting its one measly bottle of water. Every night, we would beg and plead with the cabin attendant, who would look at us askance, but finally cede to our demands. I will say that the past two days, one lone daily bottle of water has appeared without incident.

On a very positive note, these cabin attendants are right on top of things when it comes to cleaning the compartments. The minute you head to breakfast, they are in your room stowing the bed and cleaning the bathroom (albeit without leaving new towels behind). They are very good about cleaning the waste basket throughout the day, which is an especially good thing as you are not allowed to flush toilet paper in the chemical toilets.

Tried to shave my legs this morning as the train was moving. Truly a feat of derring-do. That said, it was one of the few times when I didn't end up nicking my legs. Go figure.

TaTa Siberia, Hello, Tatarstan

Friday, Kilometre 780
Kazan, Tatarstan

After passing the divide between Asia and Europe in the midst of nightfall, we arrive in the capital of the Tatar capital of Kazan one and a half hours late. However, as we have a full day's program here, the relatively short delay causes no distress.

Despite this being our first official stop in the European part of Russia, it feels like we are still in Asia....or perhaps the Middle East. Muslims, who first came to this city in 925 AD, live peacefully side by side with their Russian Orthodox neighbors, as their houses of worship, located in the city's massive Kremlin, compete for attention.

A couple of notable occurrences here in Kazan--I had my first complete conversation in Russian. It went like this:
Me: Kak Delat? (How are you?)
Androgynous Andrei the Local Tour Guide: XopaIIIo (Harasho--Good). Kak delat?
Me: XopaIIIo.

That's it.

We were also regaled with music. At the retro Karavalle restaurant, we were treated to videos of Tom Jones from the 1970s and Madonna circa 1983. Afterwards, a visit to a music school provided the backdrop for a delightful series of impressive performances from young virtuosos. The 10-year-old violinist stole the show, but the other strings, the pianists, and the reeds were equally refined. It was lovely to sit back and listen to the classical music, without worrying about taking pictures or running the video camera. That said, I did capture a few snippets.

Finally, we saw the ubiquitous Lenin statue. In the Lenin slept here category, Kazan's claim to fame is a classic case of foreshadowing. The great revolutionary was expelled from Kazan University for his rebellious ways.

And now, ta ta Tatarstan. On to Moscow.

Tsarry, Tsarry Nights

Thursday Night, 9 PM (again)
Ekaterinburg, 1814 Kilometres

After more delays, totaling five hours, we reach Ekaterinburg or Yekatinburg at 9 in the evening. This time, though, we can actually see it. It doesn't get dark here until 11:30 PM.

Although still on the Asian side of the Urals, this is a very European city. People are fashionably-dressed, in terms of what passes as fashionable here (shorts worn with hose; many women sport stilettos, but unlike the Italians, they haven't quite mastered the art of walking without wobbling). 20-somethings are skateboarding, and at sunset, young lovers stroll the romantic walkway lining the city pond. It seems a very modern city, despite that fact that during the Cold War, the presence of the military and weapons manufacturing made this a closed city over which Boris Yeltsin presided in the late 1970s and early 1980s. At the time, it was called Sverdlovsk, named after one of Lenin's right-hand men.

The country's fourth largest city is best known for its pivotal role in 20th century Russian history. Nicholas II, the last tsar of Russia, was exiled here with his family after being deposed. The Bolsheviks then knocked off the last of the Romanovs here in 1918.

In the ultimate display of Catholic guilt, Nicholas was canonized after the fall of the Soviet Union in the early 1990s. The impressive Church upon the Blood was built in 2003 as a form of repentance, confession, and remembrance.

The pcitures above: That resembling the Washington Monument is an unfinished television tower. Its claim to fame is that it is the world's tallest unfinished TV tower. The green building serves at Vladimir Putin's home away from home when he visits Ekaterinburg, which happens about every other year.

One Night in Novosibirsk

Wednesday Night, 3343 Kilometre
Novosibirsk

One of the things I love about traveling behind the former Iron Curtain is that so many quirks still exist from those rather surreal days. Last night's stop in Novosibirsk, the capital of Siberia, provided that sense of deja vu as yet unexperienced in Russia.

As noted in a previous post, the visit itself was delayed for five hours. What was supposed to be a day-time city jaunt turned into a twilight and post-twilight tour. At 9 PM, we arrive at the very impressive train station, shaped like a train by Constructivist architects who apparently took their marching orders quite literally. Build a train station, they were told, and they built a station resembling a train. We stepped out in the damp cold to watch a cultural performance while standing in puddles. Although I have never stood in a puddle to watch such a performance, it nonetheless reminded me of the ones that were de rigueur on tours designed by Intourist, Cedok, Orbis and other state-run tourist agencies.

Actually, the performance was quite pleasant, as those things go. But the odd thing was when the performance ended, one of the girls picked up a pail and solicited donations. Now, THAT would have never happened in the Soviet Union. My companions and I thought it rather beyond the pale for a luxury trip. I have never observed performers, hired by a tour company to sing for their supper, passing the hat.

Dark Lenin

Moving along,
our bus couldn't get out of the parking lot for several minutes, as the gate was closed. So, by the time the city tour by bus started, it was 9:50 PM. First stop--a statue of Alexander III next to a span of Trans-Siberian Railway bridge. With light rapidly diminishing, we then drove through what dimly appeared to be a nondescript city. By the time we got to the main attraction, the largest theater in all of Russia, it was nearly pitch black. Apparently, there was a statue of Lenin in the courtyard, along with other sculptures
we couldn't see, except in dark silhouette. But our guide acted as we had night vision, pointing out details impossible to spot.

Then there was the propanganda pitch singing the praises of Novosibirsk as the country's third largest city, its third largest cultural center, and its third largest educational center. Apparently, it is also a Russian mecca for scientific research and the ballet school there is state-supported. We were encouraged by the guide to stay for a month, so that we could go to the ballet and opera and see 25 different performances for as little as 30,000 rubles (or $100) total. I do not recommend this idea.

My overall impression of Novosibirsk-- all in all, there really is nothing to see here, which is a good thing, because we couldn't see it.

Are We There Yet?

The next two posts are marked with the days they were written. However, no Internet connection has been available for nearly three days, so I am uploading them on Friday in Kazan. We are less than 900 kilometres from Moscow.

Wednesday, 5185 Kilometres: Today is the first long slog of this Trans-Siberian adventure and it's getting sloggier by the minute. Actually, the slog started yesterday at noon, when we boarded the train after an overnight at the Courtyard by Marriott (really) in Irkutsk. In the afternoon, there was an entertaining and educational vodka tasting, followed by rest and dinner.

Because we set clocks back two hours before bedtime, we had extra time to sleep in...to the point where when the figurative breakfast bell rang at 7:30, we were all ready to eat. We were then informed that, in addition to the two new hours gained in this time zone, we had fallen behind three hours overnight due to something or other on a bridge. I didn't really get it. But the bottom line is that our next excursion off the train... a visit to the drab Siberian capital of Novosibirsk...would be delayed from 4:00 to 7:00PM. It didn't seem like a big deal at the time, but as the day wore on, we got further and further behind schedule. Getting to this industrial center seemed to be becoming a pipe dream.

At 7 PM, our original departure time FROM Novosibirsk, we were informed that construction...or a derailment...or something...had caused a traffic jam on the tracks. But we would arrive in Novosibirsk..'round about 9 PM. We should be there any minute....or not.

That said, spending today, of all days, train-bound wasn't such a bad thing. For one, it's been raining all day. For two, the germs festered by Typhoid Marty, who had been hacking into the communal food since Day 1, had now reared its head in many of our throats. Third, my period came....of course. So, all in all, if 35 hours straight had to be spent on the train, this was one of the better times to do so.

After our stop tonight, our next stretch is scheduled for 21 hours. I shall write more during that time....about Novosibirsk, the Siberian Tea Party (not affiliated with the American political wingnuts), and about good housekeeping.

Pun Linguistics Redux: Crime and Pun-ishment

In honor of my very first steppe in Russia this weekend, which coincided with the one-year anniversary of my Top 10 finish in the O. Henry Pun-Off, I reprise my Soviet soliloquy presented there.

My entry in the O. Henry Pun-Off World Championships.
Results below the fold. YouTube performance here.

During the Cold War, I had a Soviet boyfriend. CYRIL LICked the competition in college. He got high MARX He was a well-RED SQUARE even POLISHing off LENIN'S TOME. But when PUSHKIN to shove, he was STALIN about going to GRAD school. IVAN TERRIBLY for him to MATRYOSKALATE, as did his BARENTS. But he didn't like the RIGA of the POGROM.

He could have been a STURGEON, or another BELUGAtes. But he didn't want to MAXIM-ize his PROSPEKTS...to STEPPE out of his comfort zone.


Still, I loved Him. He made me feel SAFIN he was good at his KORBUT a little off-balance. But there were CAVIARs.

I won't beat around the BABUSHKA. At ANASTASIA relationship, things change. I had my Sista' SOLZHENITZYN moment when I realized the guy was a PUTSCH.

Let's CHEKHOV the list. He never MINSKED words. He could BORIS to tears. He was a bit GORKY. It IRSKED me that he was always working ENGELS. He was a snob, acting all SIBERIA. It went beyond the PALE.

I remember ONE PARTY when he drank so much Stoli that he couldn't get his BERINGs STRAIT. I was PETROV-ied he would go ANDROPOV the face of the earth.

He was a K-G-Beast. He was SOCHI-ep. He was rather VOLGA. And a bit of a SLAV. Plus, he was always ROMANOV, going PIEROGI on me. I started RUBLE-ing the day I met him.

One time, while doing TASS like IRONing CURTAINS when I said to him, "Don't UKRAINE on my parade." He replied, "CRIMEA river." That was it. I said, "I'm FINNISHED. TATAR."

All the signs should have RAISA a red flag. But I was young and TSARry-eyed and fools RUSSIAN to love.URAL looking for a moral? Y'ALTALLINN you, when you are fishin' for love, the KIEVery time is to MIRly cast a MIG NYET SOYUZ don't make the same mistakes I did. No BOLSHEVIK.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

According to my reading of the scoreboard, with this ditty, I finished #8 out of 30 for Punniest of Show. So-VI-et. I believe my downfall was artistic impression. Certainly, on technical merit, with more than 60 puns in less than two minutes, I should have skated along with a slate of 9s and 10s. Too bad there was no Russian judge. Given the cryptic nature of the language, I believe I needed a judge familiar with the territory. For example, I ended up taking out sentences like "He was oblast and had good kama" due to obscurity.

Meantime, congrats to the champion, one Jerzy Gwiazdowski from the NYC POLITeBURO of Queens. His geographic riff won the day.

Dear reader, did I miss any Russian puns? You can always do a GOGOL search and offer suggestions. Please speak up. After my mediocre FINNISH, I am needing a whole LADA love.

Don't Get Sick in China

As part of a government-run tour of China back in the mid-1980s, we made various obligatory stops at communes, factories, and a hospital. At the time, the latter seemed like a place of torture, as patients laid around undergoing procedures like cupping and acupuncture--treatments that seemed archaic at the time, but, in retrospect, rather ahead of their time. The sanitation conditions at the hospital weren't all that keen. Pity the poor Westerner who might fall ill and end up in one of China's health centers back in the 1980s.

Or pity the poor Westerner who falls ill in 2013...namely, me. It's an extremely hot May day in China. We have spent a long morning sightseeing at The Summer Palace. The afternoon is reserved for the concrete-clad Tiannamen Square and the expansive Forbidden City. It's 95 degrees, not counting the heat emanating from the pavement below. It is 2:00 PM--high time for Chairman Sun.

All is fine until we enter the Forbidden City, inside of which beverages for sale are verboten. I start feeling the effects of heat exhaustion, a condition from which I have suffered three times previously (the last after a torturous Bikram Yoga session). My heart starts palpitating, I go pale, and my mouth dries up like the Gobi. I know from experience that at this point, I am too far gone. I sit against the walls of the Forbidden City, knowing that it's a long walk to get out.

One of my colleagues runs outside the walls to buy beverages. Mostly water--which I later learn from the doctor makes matters worse--a version of Chinese Water Torture. But that's getting ahead of ourselves. I commandeer a wheelchair and ride through the rest of the Forbidden City, nearly crashing into people, rickshaws, and bicyclists along the way. But I get back to the awaiting bus one hour after the symptoms began and now feel a bit better.

That feeling was short-lived, and I knew an IV drip was the only cure. It took two hours to get through traffic to a hospital that ostensibly had an International Travel Clinic. Ostensibly, I say, as no one seemed to speak any language other than Chinese, and the toilets in the waiting area were definitely Eastern-style (not to say that some of the visiting foreigners might not be most proficient using said squatters).

After another hour, at 6 PM, I met with an English-speaking doctor and told him I believed I was suffering from heat exhaustion and dehydration. He ordered blood tests. Let it be said that Chinese nurses are not gentle with their needles, which are the old heavy metal types. After being jabbed in the wrist several times, I was finally wheeled back for an IV. I should add that my blood pressure was never taken, nor was my temperature. Furthermore, I was not given the ability to change out of my clothing, stained with sweat and, ahem, other bodily fluids.

Two young ladies from the Chinese outpost of Zarengold Tours stayed with me throughout the night and thank goodness. There was no accessible button to call the nurse. There were no regular rounds--I didn't see a doctor nor a nurse for hours at a time. When I had to take a bathroom break, my lovely ladies would grab my IV bag and hook it above the toilet. The dfacility, while Western-style, did not come equipped with toilet paper nor soap. No soap in a hospital? Not very encouraging.

Also not very encouraging--the first charge on my bill was for 6000 RBM--the equivalent of $1000. Then, each time they would run a blood test, they would take my credit card again. I can't wait to see the total.

I was dismissed at 7AM the next day, with nary a word from the on-duty doctor. My wrists were sore from the needle punctures, but at least I seemed to be rehydrated. And hopefully, my lovely TravelGuard insurance policy will cover all of the medical expenses, along with the extra hotel night I needed to stay in Beijing before rejoining my group in Mongolia.

7 Things to Remember When Traveling to China

It's been 27 years since I was last in China, and boy oh boy, have things changed.

The airport is new and shiny, with Western style toilets (hooray).
The city outskirts and innards are now lined with high-rises and highways.
Cars have replaced bicycles as the main form of transportation.
And I am sure more will be discovered during my next three days here.

But for now, let me provide 7 pieces of advice to first-time travelers to China.

1. Just because you feel overwhelmed upon arriving, remember that the basic rules of international airports still apply. Do not get money at the currency exchange located near baggage claim. Instead, wait until you are in the main terminal and use a bank ATM. You'll get a better rate. Also, don't fall prey to gypsy cab drivers, who are lurking in the arrivals terminal. The one who tried to tackle me first offered a ride to the Kempinski for 400 RNB. Noticing the scorn on my face, he reduced it to 200. In fact, the ride in the LEGAL cab cost 80 RNB.

2. Don't expect cab drivers will know English. Always print up the address of your destination in Chinese so that your driver takes you to the right place.

3. Unlike in the USA and many other Western countries, smoking is still common in China. Always request a non-smoking room. The regular rooms have an ingrained stench, even at nice hotels.

4. Sorry, no Facebook. You'll have to wait to share your posts and pix until you get beyond the Chinese borders.

5. Similarly, GMail is iffy at best. While you can do searches on Google's main page, access to Gmail and other Google apps (Blogger, Maps) is often blocked by the Chinese government. I have tried to get into GMail scores of times since arriving. I made it through twice, once through the backdoor of google.co.uk. If GMail is your main email account, prepare to forward those messages to another service before leaving home. HotMail, for example, is working fine here.

6. Even if you are traveling first-class, it's still BYOTP in many tourist toilets. What's more, said toilets may not be the, ahem, comfortable thrones to which Westerners are accustomed.

7. Avoid ending up in a Chinese hospital. More on that in the next post.

BTW, this post was uploaded in Mongolia (see #4)

Of Fonts, Bananas and Crossword Grids

Keep Reading
This will make sense shortly

Well, there aren't many benefits of being ill for a week, especially when one works from home. (Before I continue, fear not, dear reader. My plague appears a virulent form of the common cold.). I suppose one sunny side is that the indoor time has not inured me to the wave of summer weather that has recently befallen our nation's capital. The reason that is good news is I am heading to the Baltics at week's end, where temperatures are currently in single digits. And even though said numbers are in Celsius, it's still going to be pretty chilly.

But I digress, as I so often do.  Before I head out on a trip, I like to stock up on books. Being an old-fashioned gal when it comes to my reading, I prefer my ABCs in print rather than in E-form. Fortunately, prior to contracting the wayward germ that has waylaid me, I had purchased a number of books, both from local bookstores (good for me) and Amazon (I am not totally out of date, after all). So, I read three books in six days and will provide an extensive book report on my favorite, called Just My Type (this type is New Times Roman, Italic 12), in my next post. The brilliant book on fonts, penned by Simon Garfield, is a fount of information and entertainment.

But again, I digress. Blame the lingering fever. Given the avidity with which I read (I often down a 350-page book in one day), I am always thrilled when I find books that truly capture my imagination. Interestingly, the ones that do so most often are non-fiction, which some snobs might say are less creative than fiction. But I beg to differ.

In my favor is the old saw that truth is stranger than fiction. But beyond that, the fact that I often opt for histories of arcane subjects (The Toothpick; The Phone Book (not the actual phone book, but a book about the phone book); The Yugo; White Bread) ups the quirk quotient.

Before this post becomes a novella, let me list the three lovely books that kept me entertained through coughing fits, running noses (well, one runny nose), and various aches and pains.

1. CrossWorld: One Man's Journey into Americans Crossword Obsession, by Marc Romano (a history of crossword puzzles and profiles of some famous--and not-so-famous--fanatics)
2. The Banana: The Fate of the Fruit that Changed the World, by Dan Koeppel (a worldwide romp covering the sexless banana from the time of Adam and Eve through today) and
3. Just My Type, by Simon Garfield

Both CrossWorld and Banana are less than 300 pages, which make them appeeling (sic) for coast-to-coast flights. Just My Type is a little longer, but it contains more pictures (although the images in ? are mostly font types).

In case you think I am crazy in recommending Just My Type, let me offer up a brief serving of what you will learn.  Do you know what an interrobang is‽‽‽ Did you know that the & combines the letters E & T (from et, which paired with per se & and = ampersand). Want to learn what's underneath the iconic typography of the London Underground? Curious as to why Gotham (see below) was selected as Obama's campaign type? Then you are just the type to read this book. A full review to come.

New International Flights out of Washington, DC

Recently, when trying to book a non-stop flight from Moscow to Washington, DC, I learned that United had stopped running from Russia. In lieu of the only non-stop option (Aeroflot), to which I said nyet, I opted for a one-stop through Frankfurt.

Nonetheless, in looking at the options, I discovered that for those who say da to the Russian carrier, starting on June 8, there will be three non-stops weekly between DC and Moscow from which to choose. Udachi.

Other new international flights between Washington, DC and far-flung points include Etihad Airlines' daily non-stops from Dulles to Abu Dhabi. That route started on March 31. On June 17, Brussels Airlines will sprout up with IAD-BRU flights five days a week.

Heading south, United starts weekly Saturday service between Dulles and both Guatemala City, Guatemala and San Jose, Costa Rica on April 13.

Going north, United is adding Saturday and Sunday non-stops between Dulles and Vancouver starting June 8. United starts seasonal daily service to Quebec City on August 27. 

Chive Talkin'

Mark your calendars.

August 19 is National Potato Day.

Canvassing Philadelphia

This portrait of Philadelphia's art scene appeared in last weekend's Washington Post travel section.

Smack dab in the middle of Philadelphia sits one of the most significant cultural miles in the United States. The 5,280-foot stretch between City Hall and the Philadelphia Museum of Art is a major center for art, architecture, science, and public sculpture.
Framed within the mile are the Franklin Institute Science Museum, the Academy of Natural Sciences, and the newly renovated Rodin Museum, which contains the most extensive public collection of the sculptor’s work outside of Paris. When the city edition of the Barnes Foundation opened in May 2012 (after the collection’s relocation from nearby Merion), Philadelphia's magnificent mile, located along the Benjamin Franklin Parkway, became all the more compelling. Sketch the collection of the nearby Pennsylvania Academy of the Fine Arts into the picture, and you’ve got the palette of a cultural dynamo. 
The Spring Collection
A fine place to start a cultural tour of the city is the Philadelphia Museum of Art. As the collection has more than 300,000 works, it’s smart to narrow your focus. This spring, the museum explores Journeys to New Worlds. The exhibit highlights rare examples of Spanish and Portuguese Colonial art, and illustrates cultural exchanges between those countries and their colonies during the 17th and 18th centuries. For something a little more whimsical, The Art of Golf is a revealing study of the sport’s history, popularity and representation in art. It runs through July 7.

The Barnes Foundation’s move into Center City has been a big boon to the Philadelphia arts scene. Celebrated for its depth, quality, and unique art displays, the collection is known for its works by European and American masters of Impressionism, post-Impressionism, and early Modern art. From May 4 through September 2, the museum mounts an Ellsworth Kelly show. This is the Barnes’ first contemporary exhibition since 1923.

The Pennsylvania Academy of the Fine Arts hosts its Annual Student Exhibition from May 10 through June 2. Then, on June 27, a Jennifer Bartlett retrospective opens. The 40-year-career survey showcases paintings and sculptures combining abstract and representational styles.

Art at Sunset and Around Town
Why attend a plain old happy hour when you can celebrate the end of the week with a mix of music, food and fine art? The first Friday of every month, galleries in Old City, Fishtown and Manayunk celebrate independent art. Friday Night at the Barnes offers a lively mix of music, lectures, and food tastings, while the Philadelphia Museum of Art turns down the lights and turns up the tunes for Art After 5. 

The art scene extends far beyond the magnificent mile. A multi-platform audio tour, called Museum Without Walls, features the city’s public art and outdoor sculpture. Also worth exploring are some of the city's 3,600 murals. The City of Philadelphia Mural Arts Program has a variety of tours of the colorful walls found throughout diverse neighborhoods. 

Not to be missed, the Kimmel Center for the Performing Arts is home base for the citywide Philadelphia International Festival of the Arts 2013. From March 28 to April 27, If You Had a Time Machine  will (figuratively) transport audiences through time via artistic presentations. Music, theater and visual arts will be used to trace ideas of past visionaries, to examine current cultural trends, and to fast-forward into the possibilities of what’s yet to come. Some of the events are free and many are family friendly.

Traveling Chill

'Tis a far, far better thing to travel with a chill attitude than to get bent out of shape about flight delays, missed connections, and checked luggage with the potential to go AWOL. To wit, today I was awakened from my Idaho beauty sleep by a 4:50 AM MDT wake-up call. By 5:03 AM, I was on a shuttle to the Boise airport to catch a 6:19 AM flight.This would put me in Denver with two hours to spare before a flight to National (DCA) in Washington, DC. Alas, at 5:10 AM, already on my way to the airport, a message came from United saying the first flight had been delayed an hour. Knowing that I had cut it close to make the 6:19 flight, and knowing that I still had an hour to connect in Denver, I actually breathed a sigh of relief.

But as the delay stretched to 8:00 and then 8:30, I knew, intrepid veteran travel journalist that I am, I needed a Plan B to get to DC. There were no other non-stops to DCA, so I investigated non-stops to Dulles (IAD). While getting home from IAD costs $77 by taxi versus $5.00 on Metro from DCA, my first choice was still an IAD non-stop versus a one-stop to DCA through Chicago arriving five hours later.

However, choosing another airport could create a wrinkle which would cause most to furrow a brow. You see, I had checked luggage. Normally. I would travel solely with a carry-on for a nine-day trip. But as I was heading to snowy Sun Valley, I had to bring three pairs of boots (one Cowboy, one pair of knee-high Uggs, and one pair of sexy heels), plus a pair of flip-flops which doubled as workout shoes. Confused? Just suffice to say that the heavy-duty footwear would not enable me to fit in my carry-on. Nor would it allow my wardrobe to fit in there, either.

And so, la dilemma. Where would my checked bag go if I went to another airport at the last minute? Would it go to DCA? Would it make it to IAD? Or would it end up spending quality time at Denver International? For all I knew, there was a possibility it could enjoy an exotic trip to China. Frankly, whatever way United opted to orient my luggage, well, I just didn't care.

Now, I grant you, I was heading home, so it was easier to be chill about being sans luggage than if I were outbound. Then again, most people, had they had the adventure with United's missing luggage department as described in the link above, would not be so easy breezy. But looking like a Cover Girl (wearing a leather skirt and aforementioned sexy boots), I had to maintain my nonplussed mien, even upon discovering in Denver that I indeed missed my DCA flight. A useless gate agent directed me toward a long line at customer service, but I bypassed the advice and said line, by marching my sexy boots right over to Gate 43, from which Plan B was launched.

Dressed for success, I made the flight just as it was boarding. True, I was assigned a middle seat. But, it was in the Economy Super-Plus section. so I was happy as a potato. As I write this prose, I am in-flight and not a bit peckish about my bag. If it shows, it shows. If it doesn't, hasta manana. And that, mis amigos, is what traveling chill is all about.

Postscript IAD 6 PM EDT: I don't know how this happened, but the bag made my flight.

Confessions of a Film Festival Virgin: Part I

Apologies, dear readers, for the recent dearth of posts. My time has been spent hobnobbing with the hoi polloi at the Sun Valley Film Festival. That's Sun Valley, IDAHO...not, as many mistakenly believe, Iowa nor Utah.

Yes, this idyllic little burg, which is quickly becoming my home away from home (without an actual home, of course, unless a local millionaire would like to adopt me), successfully hosted its 2nd annual film gala last week. Not the monster of Sundance, nor the long lines experienced in Santa Barbara, this little event is most accessible to the film festival acolyte.

I will have more detailed reports in upcoming posts. You'll see pictures (stills, not movies); hear about my adventures with award-winning filmmakers; and you will be regaled with my homages to the magic of Sun Valley and Ketchum. No K'vetchuming here.

Meantime, please give a listen to my report on the Sun Valley Film Festival at www.aroundtheworldradio.com/aarchives.jsp. Click on segments 2 and 3 of the March 14 show.

One Token Over the Line

(Why is the iron on Dame Street?)

Few Monopoly fans seemed steamed when the iron token was summarily dismissed this winter. However, this new wrinkle left me feeling flat. But in other countries, the pressing news about the ironing board most people. Why? Because, as I discovered by studying the 25 Monopoly boards that cover my walls, most foreign games have never used the lowly household appliance as a token to begin with. 

Indeed, my in-depth investigative reporting from the walls of my house ferreted out the following: Only 20% of my games (including Ireland, seen at right) sport the iron. Neigh, many European and South American boards replace the iron with a guy on a horse. Por ejemplo, Argentina, France, and Hungary all opt for a hunky horse-bound hero.

Some of my newer games, circa this century, not only have no iron, but have replaced some of the other standard tokens through the course of modernization. For example, both Canada and Denmark replace the battleship with an airplane, and the shoe with an in-line skate. Several countries are also opting to add a cell phone (albeit the old-fashioned fold-up version versus an iPhone) in lieu of the hat. 

Some international versions of the game, for want of materials, proper molds, or a larger manufacturing budget, replace tokens with standardized plastic game pegs. Confusingly, the Tunisian version employs plastic horse heads (resembling a chess knight versus the one in The Godfather). Even more confusingly, I bought the Tunisian game in a souk in Marrakesh. It was not until I returned to the U.S. of A. that I realized something was rotten in the state of Denmark. 

But I digress. Back to the pegs. Some of the games designed for kids also employ pegs, perhaps for fear that a small dog or a miniature thimble can be easily swallowed by a ravenous child. My Brazilian Banco Imobiliario Junior is such an example. I would love to wax on about the adult Brazilian, but unfortunately, when I asked the concierge at the Rio de Janeiro Marriott to track down a game for me there (as I was on a tight schedule), she came back with the darn kids version. Perhaps she thought I was on a thong-string budget. At any rate, other games that incorporate pegs are either knock-offs--Jordan, Poland--and/or relics of Communist days of yore--Yugoslavia, Romania.

The game that takes the cake in terms of its tokens is that of Italy. My Italian Monopoli board, circa 1985, features among its tokens a candlestick, a bottle of chianti, a cheese shaker and a mushroom. All of the miniatures are crafted from wood and painted with vibrant colors.

In an upcoming post, I will detail the differences in money. But let me say here that I am distressed that my most recent purchase does not even include cash. The Canadian version circa 2012 instead uses credit cards and some electronic gizmo that looks like an old Texas Instruments calculator. No Canadian dollars? That's just loony.

Pass Go. Collect $200...or pounds....or shekels...

Some people collect spoons. Others collect charms. When I travel internationally, my souvenir item of choice is Monopoly. Now, I am very particular about my Monopoly collection. I only collect those games sold in-country about the country. In other words, no Star Wars Monopoly for me, nor the various versions highlighting universities or American cities (Chicagopoly). I am a purist.

Italy, Circa 1985
(note the tokens)

I prefer to purchase Monopoly myself, as the search is almost as rewarding as the discovery. But the fact is, if you, dear reader, go directly to Azerbaijan or Zambia and want to buy me a game, please do. However, check first to see if those countries have a licensed version of the game. Otherwise, you may spend hours roaming aimlessly, as I did in Albania and Thailand. I wandered around Bangkok for an entire day looking for Mr. Moneybags, but no dice. I used my extra two days in Tirana, the capital of Albania, searching for Monopoly, only to discover the heirs of Mr. Hoxha didn't give the game a chance.

On the other hand, I have found Monopoly (or Monopoli, as it is called in some countries) in some amazing places. Back in 1989, pre-fall-of-the-Berlin-Wall, and during the height of the Solidarity movement in Poland, I found a cardboard and wood knock-off Monopoly in a small toy store on the backstreets of Warsaw. I bought two (zloty equivalent price per game-$1) and came back to the States to query Parker Brothers about the Polish game. PB responded by asking me to snitch on the independent Polish shopkeeper who was showing solidarity with capitalism (albeit by breaking the law selling an unlicensed version). I refused to get our venturing capitalist in a jam with PB and I shut down the conversation. Then, there was Dubrovnik, Yugoslavia, also in 1989 (when Yugoslavia was still Yugoslavia).  The game cost something like 200 dinar ($40), but the shopkeeper tried to charge me 2000 dinar ($400). Fortunately, I caught the error, thus saving dinar for dinner.


Maybe it wasn't quite as surprising to find the game in Romania in 1998, but one of the versions was a surprise (right). The Bucharest version was predictable, but the other board game was a Romanian depiction of the American game. The money featured caricatures of American presidents ranging from Reagan to Nixon to a guy I think is Hoover.

As the weeks go on, I will share pictures and trivia from some of my other two dozen plus games. Meantime, here's my list of games to date.

Argentina*
Australia
Austria
Belgium
Brazil
Canada
Denmark
Estonia
France
Germany
Hungary
Ireland
Israel
Italy
Japan
Jordan (2)**
Lithuania
The Netherlands
New Zealand
Poland
Romania (2)
Russia
Singapore
Spain
Sweden
Tunisia
Yugoslavia

*Bold countries--purchased by friends; have not visited these countries
** (2) indicates two different versions of the game from the same country

Happy Valentine's Day and Presidents Day Weekend! Here are some travel ideas that I shared on NewsChannel 8's Let's Talk Live this week.




For information on the travel destinations described, please see my February 11 post. The websites for the two gifts are www.shavetech.com and www.luggageamerica.com.

From Sea to Shining Sea

When is all-inclusive not all-inclusive? When the term is used in cruise advertising. Thanks to a chart developed by All Things Cruise, we can now compare apples to oranges.

For example, it's a common misconception that your cruise price includes alcoholic drinks. Au contraire, Pierre. The chart shows that drinking isn't free on most ships, nor are gratuities and land excursions usually included in the base price.

Studying the chart, which compares the offerings of more than 30 cruise lines, leads to several interesting conclusions. Smaller ships tend offer more "freebies" than large ships do. For example, as ATC notes, the only amenity included on Carnival ships is 24-hour room service. Meantime, AMA Waterways and European Waterways, which operate small river-cruising vessels, include both land excursions and wine and cocktails with dinner. Scenic, Seabourn and Silversea appear to be the most generous in terms of their included amenities. Of course, these lines do have a more expensive base price. But as you realistically budget for a cruise, it is important to know how much extra you will need to pay in order to have the experience you expect to have, without being nickel and dimed.

As the embed code for sharing this information resulted in a chart containing cruise ship cabin-sized font (read teeny-tiny), please click here for a reader-friendly grid.

9 Questions to Ask When Choosing a Language Program Overseas

If your New Year's Resolution is to learn a new language, one of the best ways to do so is by dunking yourself into immersion classes overseas. Once you choose a language, the next step is to opt for a program. In some countries, the choices are limited. But in places like Italy, France, and Spain, there are an abundance of choices. How do you choose the best program for you? Here are some thoughts, based on my experience studying Italian in Bologna.

1. How much time do I have to devote to this exercise? 
Certain institutions focus on two-week programs for tourists, while others offer longer-term options for those who might be moving to the country. 

2. In what part of the country do I want to spend time? 

As Americans know, regional differences within one nation can be vast. The South is different from the Northeast which is different from the Pacific Northwest. Similarly, Northern and Southern Italy, for example, provide two unique experiences. Dialects, dishes, and the local culture will vary, depending on location. So study up and decide on a region that is right for you.

3. Do I want to study in a big city or a small town?

Each has its advantages. A big city will allow vast opportunities for after­-school sightseeing, while smaller towns may allow you to delve into a local community and its lifestyles and culture. A big city provides more convenient transportation options for visiting other places. In a smaller town, you may be more isolated, but it's easier to meet residents and become a part of local life.

4. How much of a language do you want to learn? 

Do you want to become fluent, or do you merely want to learn enough to get by while travel­ing through the country? Depending on your answer, consider the length of the program, the number of daily hours of classroom study, class size, and the opportunity for one-on-one instruction. If you want to get fluent fast, find a program that is at least four weeks; one that offers small classes and one-on-one tutoring; and one that offers family stays. 

5  Are you ready to work hard? 

If you are merely looking for a relaxing vacation, do be aware that hours of study every day can lead to brain drain and a type of mental exhaus­tion not experienced since Finals Week in college. Plus, you may get frustrated when the Louvre awaits and you are stuck in a classroom.  For those who want to combine vacation with vocab­ulary, study in a small town or in a resort area, or consider selecting a program in which language study is combined with a favorite interest, such as cooking or music. If you are studying in a big city, you may want to spend an extra week on your own after graduation specifically for sightseeing (and practicing your language skills).

6 Where do you want to live during your stay?

Most schools help students with lodging arrange­ments that range from stays at local pensiones to apartment-shares with other students. Another option, as previously mentioned, is the family stay. Before accepting this option, find out what you will be getting, as sometimes, this definition can be a misnomer. My "family stay" in Bologna was limited to a confining room in the apartment of a single woman (with no kitchen privileges and limited-time bathroom privileges to boot). Had I known in advance that this type of situation made up the bulk of the family stay offerings in Bologna, I might have opted for another program. 

7 What is the student body like? 

If the people with whom you are studying are impor­tant to you, ask about the demographic breakdown of the student population. One of the beauties of Cultura Italiana in Bologna was its interna­tional clientele. It drew from nearly every country imaginable, with students from Scandinavia, Germany and Japan heavily represented. English speakers from the United Kingdom and the United States had a presence, but not a large one. One advantage of studying in such a diverse setting is that students are less likely to lapse into their native languages (although, admittedly, English was the common language among the European polyglots with whom I attended class).

Age may be another matter of concern. Person­ally, I liked the diversity of my crowd, which ranged in age from 20 to 55 (and in profession from "student" to sports producer to scientist). The age range was especially large in Bologna, due to the appeal of this university town for younger people (Bologna is said to have the highest number per capita of nightclubs in ltaly). However, Cultura Ital­iana 's other campuses, located in smaller and quieter places, attract an older crowd, including retirees. The bottom line: check the demographics.

8 What is the method of teaching? 

At Cultura Italiana, students were separated accord­ing to levels in grammar and speaking. The first two hours of the day were devoted to Italian grammar with others at a similar level of under­standing. Then, in the speaking class, another group of students were peers in terms of oral ability.  This structure worked very well, given that speaking and grammar skills can vary so dramatically. Do you want to focus on speaking skills, writing skills or both? Also find out average class size. The student-teacher ratio can be crucial in the learning process..

9. What extracurricular activities are offered?

Extracurricular activities can be every bit as impor­tant in the learning process as the classroom experi­ence. Many schools offer after-hours programming, including wine tastings, film viewings, and museum visits (ask to see if such programming costs extra). Not only are these extracurriculars a good way to practice a language and learn about a culture, but they also provide an informaI setting with which to bond with your fellow students. If your desire to learn a language is secondary to engaging in other cultural pursuits, consider enrolling in a course where you can combine those interests with language study. For example, you can learn Italian while focusing on mosaic-making in Ravenna, painting in Perugia, or cooking in Bologna. 

ADDITIONAL TIPS 

1. Start the learning process at home. A good basic knowledge of a language will allow you to get more out of your classes in a shorter amount of time.

2. Go to films and watch TV. Because of the speed at which dubbers often have to speak, it might be easier to watch programming with which you are already familiar. Another option is to watch the local news, where subject matter and video can put unfamiliar words in context.

3. Eavesdrop. Sit in a café and pretend to read while listening to conversations at nearby tables. If traveling via train, close your eyes and listen to what your cabin-mates are saying.

4. Take city tours, or guided tours of museums or tourist attractions, in the local language. The milieu will make what is being said easier to understand.

5. Speak all the time and don't be intimidated, even if you stumble. When Americans make an attempt to speak a foreign language in its home country, the locals do appreciate the effort. Most are happy to accommodate you by speaking slowly and helping you finish your sentences.

Ciao, Tutti: Parte Prima

Is your New Year's Resolution to learn a new language? One of mine is to polish my rusty Italian tongue (figuratively, not literally, of course). Thus, I am now taking classes with a lovely group at Casa Italiana in Washington, DC. But some six or seven years ago, my place of study was Bologna, Italy. Here is a recap of the adventure written for Ambassador Magazine.

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Learning vacations are all the rage these days. And among those who can trace their genes to another country, a popu­lar option is to learn a language at the roots of the family tree.

Fortunately for those of Italian heritage--and even for those with nary a drop of sangue italiano -- the options for studying the language in the old ­country are abundant. In fact, perhaps the hard­est part of studying in ltaly is making the decision of which school to attend. 

After four weeks of studying at Cultura Italiana in Bologna, the biggest lesson I learned was that in order to get the experience you expect, you need to ask the right questions prior to enrolling in a particular school. Before detailing a list of questions, let me relate my own experience at Cultura Italiana.

Lost in translation

It's funny how the adult brain doesn't process language quite as easily as the more nimble, less-cluttered teenage mind. While the ability to learn languages easily may be the province of the young, it is never too late to give the process a go.  As I had quickly learned to speak fluent Spanish as a teen, I figured it would be a breeze to pick up a sister Romance language like ltalian.  However, a spell studying Italian at a Santa Barbara community çollege taught me that while learning grammar was a proverbial piece of torta, the difficulty, dear Brutus, was in the oration. 

Ergo, I came to the conclusion that the only way to learn to speak properly was to go to school in Italy and become immersed in the language for several weeks. 

Making that decision was easy. Selecting a school from among the hundreds of choices was the chal­lenge. After surfing the Internet, I found a virtual plethora of programs for everyone from the novice to the novelist. Name a pIace - Firenze, Perugia, Roma, Milano, Salerno, Lucca - and there was a school... or two...or three...in each. Given the choices, I turned to the Istituto Italiano di Cultura (IlC) in San Francisco, one of five such centers across the United States.  The cultural office of the Italian Ministry of Foreign Affairs, the IlC offers an extensive scholarship program with the mission of promoting Italian culture and language. The IlC selects candidates for full and partial tuition scholarships offered by more than 50 schools.

I applied for and received a scholarship to Cultura Italiana, a school located in a former palazzo in Bologna (the program also has a branch in Arezzo). I was to study Italian in class four hours a day, every week ­day, for four weeks. Additionally, I would be placed in a home (or so I thought) where I could practice my Italian every night with a host family.

The instruction was excellent, as classes were molded  to the needs of the international group of students. But, I did have a few beefs with my Bologna experience. Opportu­nities for socializing with other students outside the classroom were limited and the school had no  common areas for gathering and group study. The living situations were not ideal (see Parte Due). Plus, when students  went "home" at night, each headed to a different area of the city, making evening tete-a-tetes quite a test.

While my weeks of study did not allow me to be fluent enough to write this article in Italian, I did gain valu­able knowledge. For now I am fluent in the ques­tions you need to ask in order to ensure you receive the educational/cultural/social experience desired during the course of an intensive language course. 9 Questions to Ask When Choosing a Language Program is next.

Places to Go and Things to Do in the New Year

Where in the world will you go this year? If you are following trends, you will be getting off the beaten path in search of adventure and the exotic. Forget sun and sand. Be part of the avant-garde cognescenti.

The lure of forbidden lands is beckoning this year--even though it seems there are getting to be fewer and fewer of those places on the list. Before the fall of the Berlin Wall, Eastern Europe and the USSR were considered--if not verboten for travelers--then certainly alien. Prior to the mid-1980s, the same held for China. And then there have always been places that are the geographic equivalents of personae non gratae due to political reasons--including South Africa during apartheid, Burma until last year, and perhaps Iran even now.

In talking forbidden lands, I am not recommending war zones. Rather, I am talking about the axis of exotic--Burma (Myanmar), Cuba and North Korea.

Now that the government of Burma has finally chilled out, and long-time opposition leader and Nobel Peace Prize winner Aung San Suu Kyi is not only out from under house arrest, but sitting in the Houses of Parliament, more Americans are open to visiting the country. And Burma is reciprocating by opening the doors to what was formerly a country largely shut off from the rest of the world.

Visas are becoming easier to acquire--back in 1997, when I visited, it took months to get a visa and I could not list my occupation as journalist. At least 50 new hotels are being built to meet the demand, and more tour companies are adding Burma to their itineraries. Given the pent-up demand that built during the decades of dictatorship, tourism officials in Burma are expecting a doubling of tourist arrivals by 2016.

It's a hot spot, for sure, but it's still a place where you can still step back in time. No McDonald's, no KFC, spotty Wi-Fi, etc. So, if you visit in the next year or two, you will largely experience what I did 15 years ago, albeit with construction cranes replacing the large billboards broadcasting the People's Desires, as outlined by the former junta.


Burma is a land unspoiled by mass tourism. When I visited, I was struck by the beauty of the countryside and the gentle nature of the people. Still, back then, paranoia was rampant and getting the locals to talk was a challenge. But now, I imagine, tourists will find it a fascinating time to chat up a Burmese population experiencing elevated levels of freedom of speech for the first time in years.

You won’t necessarily find such freedom of speech in Cuba and North Korea, but those countries, too, are high on the interest list. Cuba, of course, has been open to the rest of the world forever, but it’s been restricted to Americans since 1961. And the fact is, Americans can travel legally to Cuba--it’s just that they will be breaking federal law if they spend money there.

Nonetheless, most Americans who want to go to Cuba can travel there freely, as long as they go under the auspices of a licensed tour company. For awhile last year, those licenses were lifted--one could blame presidential politics and the Florida vote--but they have been reinstated and so you can go without breaking any laws. North Korea is also legal, and if you go there, you will definitely have bragging rights as being among the few who have braved the Hermit Kingdom, a place where time stands still...or runs backward.