Traveling in Russia: Images of Moscow

Just revisited Moscow in July thanks to Viking River Cruises. Here are nine images taken there. Check them out while listening to this radio segment updating the tourism situation in Russia.

Vintage Portrait of a Young Pioneer
at Izmailovsky Market.

Cyrillic 101: Mockba=Moscow

I spy the Kremlin.

The famous GUM department store has transitioned
into a luxury mall featuring Louis Vuitton and
Manoli Blahnik.

Leaving Moscow on the Viking Truvor.

The Quirky Museums of St. Petersburg, Russia

After leaving the oh-so-chic Faberge, my next mission is finding the Museum of Hygiene, a Soviet-era relic that would appeal to my taste for the quirky. I head to Italyanskaya Street, which is right around the corner from the Faberge Museum. I stumble upon the sign below  and assume I have accomplished my mission.

It's a natural mistake to make. One sees a microscope, and understands the Cyrillic to read "Museum Russia Levsha".  I don't know what Levsha means, so I'm thinking maybe he's a famous Soviet doctor.  Thus, I go in, pay my admission (300 rubles--same as

the entry fee to the Hermitage), and come upon a caboodle of microscopic masterpieces.

A wee Winnie the Pooh, Piglet
and Eeyore sitting on a walnut shell

I'm talking teeny-tiny works of art--all less than 1 millimeter in size, and all viewable only through a microscope. Clearly, this is not the Museum of Hygiene. No, I have discovered the Russian Levsha, founded by the International Craft Guild of Masters.

Microscopes lined up inside
the  Russian Levsha

Aside from Winnie the Pooh and friends hanging on a walnut shell, you see things like the world's smallest matryoshka doll balanced on the top of a strand of hair and camels carved into the eye of a needle. 

A miniature masterwork by Vladimir Aniskin

In case you are wondering, it turns out that "Levsha" ( Левше) is a Russian folk hero, a left-handed artisan who is able to craft shoes for a flea.   

After peering through dozens of microscopes, it's time to continue my quest for the Museum of Hygiene. And there it is, located just down the block. Housed in yet another St. Petersburg palace (circa 1755), the interior definitely hearkens back to Soviet days. 

I translate this as
"Profane the Nature"
Russian speakers, please correct me.

The museum was founded in 1919, shortly after the Russian Revolution. It was part of the plan by the new Soviet of the People's Commissars to drive home the importance of health and hygiene. 

Aside from numerous posters depicting warnings against all sorts of evil, there's Pavlov's Dog. I kid you not. An encased Pavlov's Dog, which should ring a bell to my intelligent audience, is the centerpiece of an exhibit covering conditioned reflexes. I must admit, looking at the caged beast inspired a gag reflex in me.*

Unconditionally, this is Pavlov's Dog.

Speaking of KG-beasts, another offbeat St. Petersburg museum is Gorokhovaya 2: The History of the Political Police and State Security. The  locals call it the KGB Museum. Sadly, I stumble upon it during the weekend, when it is closed (it's open from 10-6 weekdays). So, I cannot provide a first-hand report. I can say that it is located in an Art Nouveau building that housed the  bodies of political control from pre-Revolution days through the Soviet era. According to the website, inside are expositions covering the "activities of secret services that ensured the political security in the Russian Empire and the USSR, the suppression of dissent, and the role of secret services in political society." 



*More on Pavlov's dogs here.

St. Petersburg Travel Tips: Museums

Having just spent five days in St. Petersburg, Russia, I learned that there is a paucity of good travel information about the city. So, here's some inside skinny just for you.

1. Everyone knows about the Hermitage. But not everyone knows about the newest Hermitage outpost.

The Hermitage is Russia's largest museum. The main building is housed in the Winter Palace, the former home of several tsars. For years, the most popular galleries in the behemoth building consisted of works from Western Europe--more specifically, from the studios of Impressionist and post-Impressionist era giants like Monet, Van Gogh, Picasso and Matisse. But here's the scoop. Last December, this collection was relocated across Palace Square to the General Staff Building. As of yet, no one seems to know about the move. So, while the old Hermitage is packed with throngs of tourists, the General Staff Building is almost empty. So, canvas this impressive collection before word gets out.

Top: Vincent Van Gogh: Chaumieres a Auvers-sur-Oise (1890)
Bottom: Henri Matisse: The Red Room (1908)

2. The Hermitage is dirt cheap. 

The Hermitage is actually a collection of museum facilities. Six hundred rubles buys you an entry ticket to the Main Museum Complex and the branches, including The General Staff Building, Winter Palace of Peter the Great, and the Museum of the Imperial Porcelain Factory. If you want to go to just one branch, entry is 300 rubles (less than 6 dollars). If you don't want to stand in an endless line to purchase tickets, buy online.  The first Thursday of the month is free entry. More information can be found here.

The Hermitage and Alexander Column

3. The Faberge Museum is fabulous. 

This addition to the St. Petersburg art scene opened in the fall of 2013. The museum contains the largest collection of the works of Carl Faberge, jeweler to the tsars. Many of the pieces come from the famed Malcolm Forbes collection, which was purchased by Russian gazallionaire Viktor Vekselberg in 2004. The highlights are nine Imperial Easter Eggs created by Faberge for the last two Russian tsars--Alexander III and Nicholas II. (Prior to Vekselberg's purchase, St. Petersburg had been eggless).

There are more than 4,000 works of art in the museum, so make sure to spend some time. The Faberge Museum is open every day except Friday. From 10 to 6, the exhibition is only available for viewing with a guided tour. An English-language guided tour is available at least once per day, or you can join any tour wearing an audioguide. From 6 PM to 8:45 PM, visitors can explore the museum on their own.

Lilies of the Valley
Imperial Easter Egg 1908

The renovated Shulalov Palace (circa 1799), in which the collection resides, is a masterpiece in and of itself. 

The dome inside the main hall of
Shulalov Palace

Exterior of the Faberge Museum

4. In addition to its glam museums, St. Petersburg also has its share of the quirky. 

To wit, one museum features Pavlov's dog. Another showcases micro-miniatures: wee pieces of art smaller than one millimeter...and only visible by microscope. More on those unconventional menageries in the next post.  

The Hygiene Museum or the
Miniatures Museum? See next post for the answer.

Retro Soviet posters at the Museum of Hygiene

Learning Foreign Languages: Russian 101

Having just returned from my second trip to Russia, I am finding that my ability to read the language has improved vastly since I first posted this. It's a good thing, too, as getting around the country without some knowledge of the Cyrillic alphabet is challenging. And so, for wannabe polyglots, here again is a primer.

To get around Moscow by Metro, it is
essential to know how to read Russian.
In St. Petersburg, however, there is English signage.

  

Now that we have covered the basic Cyrillic alphabet, let's proceed to a reading lesson. I chose to spend my one free day in Moscow last May wandering the Arbat and silently phonetically mouthing out the names of familiar fast food franchises. I highly recommend this strategy for those trying to learn the seemingly impenetrable Iron Curtain that is Cyrillic.

First, we visit McDonalds. This one is easy, right? MAK=MAC. The fourth character looks like the Greek delta Δ--which is D. O becomes an A sound in Russian when the syllable is unstressed, so we've got DO. In our previous lesson, we learned that H =N, so HA is NA. The third to last character is the Cyrillic version of L. Then we are back to delta, and C=S. What does it spell? McDonalds.

Very good. Now, let's get a cup of KOФE. Note the third letter, which looks the same as the Greek version of F (phi). Sound it out. You have coffee. Excellent. But where to get our coffee? Perhaps CTAPБAKC.

Now we need a doughnut to accompany our coffee. We do not get coffee at the pink and orange establishment above, because we cannot read the sign that says "Coffee & More". After all, we are reading in Russian. But ДAHKИH ДOHATC sounds Дelicious. To translate, we need to close the one hole in our doughnut sign literacy.  И =ee. Hence, Dahnkeen Donahtc. Close enough.

Let's moo-ve/MYB (merely a transliteration) on. 

MY MY, or Moo Moo, is a popular fast food chain in Moscow. If you can't read the Cyrillic, just look for the black and white корова.

Finally, let's wash this all done with a bottle of BOДA. B=V. The O sounds like A, due to the stress. Voila, Vahdah. Let's take a sip and call it a day/ДEHb. 

Of Ebola, Russian Airspace and the Middle East

Well, that's an appealing headline, no? Nonetheless, if you are game to watch, here's a link to my most recent NewsMax TV segment.

What's Up in SIberia?

Maybe very little, if the Russians have their way. Due to the continuing strife between Ukraine and Russia, the European Union has finally placed numerous sanctions on Russian businesses. One of the sanctions impacted Dobrolot, a new budget airline owned by Aeroflot. The airline just started flying in June, and its key route was a heavily-subsidized route (starting at $29 one-way) between Moscow to Crimea.

The EU, saying the airline was "facilitating the integration of Crimea into Russia" cancelled the leases on the carrier's European-owned Boeing jets and annulled insurance and maintenance contracts. As a result, the airline had to suspend service on August 4.

Now, Russia is pondering retaliation of its own. Should it close airspace over Siberia, European carriers will have to fly thousands of additional miles to get to destinations in Asia. Most nonstops between Europe and Asia save up to four hours and $30,000 by flying over Siberia. Longer routes will mean higher fuel and labor costs, and more strain on the equipment, staff and passengers. According to an article in Forbes, Lufthansa says it could lose 1 billion euro in three months if Siberian airspace is closed.

Both Lufthansa and Air France-KLM send the most planes over Siberia--about 500 a week combined. Interestingly, though, the move could hurt Russian air carrier Aeroflot even more. Currently, Aeroflot collects an overflight fee from all carriers flying in Russian airspace. Last year, it collected $170 million. Given that the airline's profit is around $200 million annually, a vast drop in overflight fees could plunge Aeroflot into the red. Plus, the EU could potentially ban Aeroflot flights to Europe.

Caption: Lake Baikal, Siberia

Learning Russian Fast-Food Style

Now that we have covered the basic Cyrillic alphabet, let's proceed to a reading lesson. I chose to spend my one free day in Moscow last May wandering the Arbat and silently phonetically mouthing out the names of familiar fast food franchises. I highly recommend this strategy for those trying to learn the seemingly impenetrable Iron Curtain that is Cyrillic.

First, we visit McDonalds. This one is easy, right? MAK=MAC. The fourth character looks like the Greek delta Δ--which is D. O becomes an A sound in Russian when the syllable is unstressed, so we've got DO. In our previous lesson, we learned that H =N, so HA is NA. The third to last character is the Cyrillic version of L. Then we are back to delta, and C=S. What does it spell? McDonalds.

Very good. Now, let's get a cup of KOФE. Note the third letter, which looks the same as the Greek version of F (phi). Sound it out. You have coffee. Excellent. But where to get our coffee? Perhaps CTAPБAKC.

Now we need a doughnut to accompany our coffee. We do not get coffee at the pink and orange establishment above, because we cannot read the sign that says "Coffee & More". After all, we are reading in Russian. But ДAHKИH ДOHATC sounds Дelicious. To translate, we need to close the one hole in our doughnut sign literacy.  И =ee. Hence, Dahnkeen Donahtc. Close enough.

Let's moo-ve/MYB (merely a transliteration) on. 

MY MY, or Moo Moo, is a popular fast food chain in Moscow. If you can't read the Cyrillic, just look for the black and white корова.

Finally, let's wash this all done with a bottle of BOДA. B=V. The O sounds like A, due to the stress. Voila, Vahdah. Let's take a sip and call it a day/ДEHb. 

Learning Russian: An Olympian Feat

I have been taking Russian for the past three weeks. Actually, full disclosure, as I am not trying to be a K-G-Beast, I took an introductory class three years ago, but I didn't get high marx. In fact, I never got beyond learning the ABC's...or in the case of the Cyrillic alphabet, the AБB's.

www.thegrissom-gram.blogspot.com

 My knowledge of that alphabet was enhanced by

 last year's trip to Russia, where I putin free time

 attempting to read restaurant (pectopah) signs. 

I will detail that exercise and my steppe-by-steppe progress 
in Russian classes in upcoming posts. Meantime,
for those confused by the order of the Parade of Nations 
at the Sochi Opening Ceremony, let me attempt to 
explain, given my rudimentary knowledge of Cyrillic.
I hope it will be godunov for you.

As you can see from the chart above, Cyrillic has a variety of 
characters. Some look familiar to those who know English; 
some look familiar to those who know Greek (pi); 
and others look downright unfamiliar.

Further mucking up the works is that many of the letters that look 
familiar are not pronounced the way we think they should be. 
B=V; P=R and H=N. Our B is the Russian Б (sort of); 
our P is the character that looks like pi П; and our H does exist. 

And don't even get me started on Ч, Ш, Щ or the bI.

Transliteration: Blini

So, let's refer back to the chart above. Because B which actually 
sounds like V is the third letter of the Cyrillic alphabet, 
Venezuela (Венесуэла) and the Virgin Islands (in the Winter Olympics?) 
were near the beginning of the parade and the Czech Republic (Чехия) and Chile (Чили), featuring that damned Ч (sound similar to the ch in chai), were near the end. Jamaica (Ямайка) and Japan (Япония) were the last to enter alphabetically. As is tradition, the host country  Россия, came last.

By the way, for fans of the Olympics Cold War style, remember the CCCP worn by Olga Korbut and her ilk? It stands for Сою́з Сове́тских Социалисти́ческих Респу́блик. Gogol it.

Soviet Style

I don't even know if Psy could do Soviet style justice. Yes, my friends, it still exists, 20 years after the Soviet Union ceased to exist (on the map, but maybe not completely in the Russian mind).

This morning, I dined with a stuffed bear over my shoulder. I am staying in the Radisson Slavyanskaya--a property surely converted from an old-school Soviet hotel. The public areas are immense, but dark and ill-decorated (note the bear). The staff is generally unhelpful and looks at you as if every question asked is the stupidist query in the world. For example, this morning, I asked a concierge and two bellmen where to find the AeroExpress ticket booth in the neighboring Kievskaya Train Station. This question seemed like a no-brainer--I imagine half of the people staying here do so because the hotel sits adjacent to the rail station, from which the express train to Vkunovo airport departs. Not one of the three had a clue. Now, to be fair to Radisson, it's not the brand. For the two previous nights, I stayed at the Radisson Blu Belorusskaya, a new-concept design hotel, and the visit, from the decor, to the staff, to the food, was just lovely.

(I would have stayed on, except the Belorusskaya did not have what the Slavyanskaya has....location, location, location...by the Kievskaya train station. Plus, for an English speaker laid up in bed for 24 hour straight (namely me), the Slavyanskaya certainly had more options on TV, including CNN, CNBC, TCM, BBC, and English versions of NHK, RT and CCTV, plus Eurosport. That said, I found myself drawn to a game show on the Italian RAI. My understanding of the wacky goings-on seemed to prove that the part of the brain that translates languages, once stimulated in a foreign environment, brings to the forefront previouly learned information. Look at me, a writer doing scientific experiments on the fly.)

But, after that digression of a parenthetical paragraph, you, dear reader, may question whether I am actually a writer. Back to our thesis. While you might not realize it from walking down Moscow's main shopping drags, now lined with the stores of luxury brands ranging from Hermes to Mikimoto, or by walking through GUM, the formerly glum shopping mall of chronic Soviet shortages, which is now a deluxe capitalist mecca, but Soviet style still exists, mainly in the form of the service mentality....or lack thereof.

Back in the days of the USSR, yessir, you had a job for life, regardless of your attitude. So, whether you were a hotel clerk, a waiter, or a flight attendant, it didn't really matter if you did your job well...or with pleasure. In talking with some Marriott executives in Moscow, they acknowledged that training staff to have a Western manner of hospitality is still a challenge. Actually, it wasn't a direct acknowledgement as much as a chuckle of agreement when I mentioned the rather dour attitude of the Russian staff that served the Trans-Siberian Express. Indeed, the representative from Lernidee, the operator of the tour, said that the German company does try to train the Russian staff it is handed at the beginning of the tourist season. But old dogs (even if they are young) don't easily learn new tricks....or new mentalities... overnight. With centuries of oppression, current day challenges and a Debbie Downer DNA working against them, it is not, as our tour guide Valeri pointed out, in the Russian nature to be smiley or effusive--especially if not fortified by vodka.